Frienemy

My little friend, enemy

My little frienemy

You speak so boldly and yet feel so unheard

Undeterred

You lie to your own self

About you

About him

About me

And then you wish we would leave you alone.

My little frienemy, keep it all in mind

Yes, all at once, impossible knowledge

Remember it all

Now, now, now!

No, stupid, I'm not that stupid

I can play this game too.

Lines upon lines by my little frienemy

Painted on the world wide web of your soul

You clever little spider

Spinning everything up

Spinning you

Spinning him

Spinning me

And then you say you're not spinning at all.

My little friend, enemy, frienemy

Feel nothing an believe everything

Yes, now, you're worthless if you can't

Now, now, now!

No, stupid, I'm not that stupid

You're only worthless when you don't try.

Friend, enemy, frienemy

You speak so boldly to all our faces

And then say we're wrong

Wrong, wrong, wrong

To think you meant it

To think it was all about us

About you

About him

About me

And then you say we're fools for thinking.

Frienemy, that is all you will ever be

If you don't realize

You're nothing without us

It is love that gives you worth

To deny yourself and to be loved by others

That makes you a friend

Your self love makes you an enemy

My little frienemy, your folly is your own.

You're not coming, and I can cope with that
If you'd just leave me alone for once
You're not coming, and I can live with that
If you'd just stop making promises for once

You swear that this time you'll make the point to stop by
You swear you love me, and everything has changed
You swear that this time you'll be a friend who gets it right
You swear that this time you won't go away

You were the brother I'd prayed for
And I was the sister, you swore
But you let everything change
When all I asked was that you'd stay

So don't tell me you're coming if you don't know
Don't tell me you love me if you're going to go
Don't say I'm worth your time if you've got none to spend

Writer's Block Oxymoronized

Maybe if I Start Spouting Out Notes it'll Miraculously Turn Into a Beautiful Song

These days are tearing at my penmanship
Dusting over the cover of my heart
Dearest, I just want to write it down
No soul, no magic, no novelty, no art
I just want to write it down.

These days are wearing down my patience
Forcing the weather to restrain and withhold
Dearest, the weather is burning inside me
And it's tearing apart these walls with its hurricane
I just want to write it down.

But the pages still contain only lines
Where words had danced until they were perfect
And the lines contain only black
Where my ink chose to blot itself out
So my soul remains hidden behind this shell of me
And my notebook remains empty except for this